Mod Sun Is As Transparent As Can Be As He Confides In Fans About Struggling With Sobriety And Bella Thorne Breakup
Sobriety is not linear, it is a rollercoaster and rapper Mod Sun is getting real about his struggle. The artist took to Instagram to be completely transparent with his fans.
Mod recently celebrated 100 days of sobriety and has saved tens of thousands of dollars by not purchasing drugs or alcohol. Although he couldn't be more ecstatic about his recent good decisions, he is being honest about how hard it is to stay clean.
Mod shared a poem to Instagram that read: 'This routine is eating me alive. 5 days on cloud nine feeling like nothing can stop me, then stay up for 2 days torturing myself with disgusting thoughts. I’m lonely. I stare at myself in the mirror so much. I’m pushing away everyone close to me. Of course I’m making my best art ever because u know all this pain is supposed to be worth something fancy + grandiose. I’d trade a good day for a bad song right now tho that’s for sure. I used to have drugs for times like these + now no matter how positive my life has changed since quitting...I miss them. Alcohol was like a warm friend on a cold day + now it’s become my enemy I go to war with everyday.'
He also opened up about his public breakup with Bella Thorne .
The post continued: ' My last relationship clearly messed me up no matter how hard I deny it, I’m afraid to let anyone get close to me even tho I have definitely found someone I really like...What hurts most is I know y’all look to me for inspiration, but being honest + transparent about everything makes me feel good about myself during all this. I need to get it out + I have nobody else right now. I really hope these things I’m going thru will be able to help others make better decisions or help anyone else going thru similar things feel less alone. I know this is all a part of healing + recovery so I just pray for the strength to keep going.'
The 32-year-old's personal life may be complicated but his music career couldn't be better.
His new single I Remember Way Too Much has racked up nearly 200,000 views on Youtube.