In her new memoir, Yolanda Hadid revealed she was ready to end it all. The reality TV star’s struggle with Lyme disease has led her to have suicidal thoughts more than once, and she got candid about her darkest times in her new book.
The 53-year-old suffered physical pain and depression as a result of the disease, and at some point she isolated herself, not being able to handle any social situations.
The book details some really dark thoughts Yolanda had to deal with while she was getting treatment during Christmas holidays in 2014.
Her husband at the time, David Foster was alongside her as they were having a nice walk on the beach.
That is when she decided to get into the ocean and end it all.
In her mind, she begged God to take her away from al the pain and suffering she was going though.
But when she thought about her three kids, she changed her mind.
However, it was not over – about a year later, the suicidal thoughts came back.
One morning, she woke up with an excruciating headache and with every bone in her body feeling like it was on fire.
‘I move as quickly as I can to the bathroom, which is not quickly at all. After barely making it to the toilet, I lie down on the cold bathroom floor. I feel like I want to die. I cannot possibly go through another day. God, please take me. Please!’ she recalls begging.
Despite Yolanda’s claims that she went through hell, during the divorce proceedings, Foster’s children slammed her, claiming that if she was still able to be active on Real Housewives it means she was not dying!
Hadid and Foster’s divorce was finalized in May of 2017.
She still battles the disease today.